Why We Should Not be Afraid of Death

Spores, welcome back to the Two Fun Guys podcast. We have a very special episode for you today. We have Jesse Elder. This is one of those episodes that you just want to share with everybody and just having this conversation had a deep impact on me. Sure it had a, you know, profound impact on you. Before we get into this episode, we want to promote our Mushroom sauna hat. As you know, if you watched other episodes, we got into Amazon 34 years ago, and we realized that just getting into a business to make money was not the move. And Doing something that we're passionate about, wanna Do something very creative and having this podcast to help people's minds expand, help you improve your health, fitness, and just have fun and spark more fun in your life. We created this product because Austin is all about mushrooms and saunas. And so, if you want to support us and rock the dopest sauna hat to ever exist on planet Earth, check it out at TFGpod.com. We appreciate the support and uh we'll get into this episode.

All right, spores, what's up everybody? Jesse Elder. Here we are. Thank you for coming. It's been a long time coming, a long time. So there's a million directions that I want to take this and we'll probably hit 500,000 of those directions. But quick backstory, so just you and I have kind of rotated around each other for a little while. And when I moved to Austin, two people that I respect and consider close friends both said, you know, who you got to meet this guy Jesse Elder. And then, uh, when we got here. You and I met at an insane party. Just ran into each other at this crazy party with flamethrowers and aliens and wrestling jello wrestling, yeah, national anthem plan. It was, you know, it was, it was, it was powerful. Crazy times. And, uh, yeah, and then I just kept following your content. I really started enjoying it and seeing value to it, and then I joined your sigma group. Which was, which was incredible. And yeah, and you and Brent have known each other in passing a bit.

Yeah, we just always rent, run into each other at Sunlife randomly. Sun Life, the watering hole of Austin's vibrational elite. Absolutely. That's that's a good way to do it. So yeah, man, I mean, we're both super excited to, to talk to you and, and we've also, you know, Armenta, she was actually our very first guest. Arraina was our very first guest. And I, and I did Ista with her and did you do it with her? Yeah. Hm yeah, exactly. These are all, all connected all full circle. Yeah. So like I said, there's a million directions. I think the first place I want to go is learning more about your background and how you got to here because I know about your martial arts background. You own martial arts schools, taught people how to run martial arts schools, and then to me there's this blank spot where you now become this, um, Um, like you've mastered all these crafts of copywriting and, and business and, uh, and men's work and leadership and all these things. So, I'm curious about that middle ground and sort of this transition between being in the business world and then coming into like leading groups and spirituality.

Uh, well, that's a hell of an intro, gentlemen. This is, uh, this gives me a sense of where we're, we're going to go. Uh, and it's really good to be here, like just knowing each of you guys personally and not even knowing that you knew each other, not even knowing that you had a podcast until more recently, and then, and here we are. So, um, To explain all that, it would probably be useful to to go backwards for a second. Um, Uh, you know, I was born in Austin and my parents absolutely remarkable beings. They, according to each of them, verified separately much later in my life, uh, when I was born, they allegedly looked at me and said, we feel like this kid is going to know what he needs for himself more than we do. So we're just gonna love him and stay out of his way. And they did. And as a result, um, I had a Remarkable childhood, uh, tons of love, just absolute support. There was never any question of, you know, are you loved? Are you worthy? None of that. It was all just affirmed, but, and there was massive, massive carte blanche to do whatever you feel like you wanted.

And so as long as the chores are done in the morning, it's like we'll see you at dinner. Have a good day. And I'm like 6. Wow. And just free reign to roam around the neighborhood, total, total free reign, and it was, you know, people have heard this before and they're like that sounds like abandonment. Like, no, that's only because most six year olds are helpless, but like a proper six year old capable than most millennials today, so. Danger is, is what makes humans be really good at being human. And if you don't have the presence of danger or risk in your life, You just really never learn to trust yourself. And if somebody doesn't trust themselves, then it makes it very hard for others to trust them and because that, especially those early years were so filled with um Just adventures, you know, and I just remember just playing in the backyard for hours and like figuring out how to make a rope swing.

Once I got the, you know, we got the rope swing up there, then I was looking at the top of the house and realized the end of the rope will reach the top of the house and how do I do that? And, and it was, it was, you know, it was a very Tom Sawyer childhood and, you know, read a ton and, and my parents just had this amazing Philosophy, um, just kind of experimental attitude. They're just like we just trust that this is going to work. And there was always this this relationship between freedom and responsibility that every time I wanted to have a new freedom, I wanted to stay up later or whatever. Um, usually my mom, she would say, well, you know, that's a new freedom. So what's the new responsibility you're going to take on? And I'd say, well, you know, I'll do the dishes. She's like, that's already your job. Like, OK, I'll, uh, I'll change my baby brother's diapers, you know, or do the laundry. She's like, that's also already your job. I feed the chickens. She's like, also your job. Uh, I mow the lawn, she's like, done, like, damn it.

Rusty push mower in South Texas in the summer because I wanted to stay up late and watch Saturday Night Live, but I got them, got the lawn done and got to stay up late, and that connection was formed pretty early in my life and it was, it was very consistent and, uh, we also were intentionally um below the or like right at the poverty line, and this is something I didn't even remember until my dad died a couple of weeks ago that he He's a school teacher. He had a bunch of odd jobs and intentionally decided that that our family was going to live on enough money that he wouldn't have to pay taxes because he didn't believe in funding war. So he intentionally kept his income low, um, which now that I understand all the law stuff like, oh man, you could have. If only you knew what we know and your earning power, Dad is really good. And if you could have still been a non-taxpayer, wouldn't that have been cool? But then we, I wouldn't have changed anything because, you know, you, you what you lack in resources you, you generate in resourcefulness, and so it's just an incredibly creative childhood.

All that to say, thanks for coming to my therapy session. Um, it was, please do, please do. I'll pay you in uh in uh rope swing making classes. The idea behind Not not being interfered with, not being surveilled, not being programmed and conditioned and prescribed, even if it's coming from love. The, the love that I received growing up was deeply emotionally intelligent, but tactically absent. It was like, We love you so much, we're gonna let you fuck up. We love you so much, we're gonna let you experience the full consequence of all of your choices, reward, punishment, life is going to reward you. Life is gonna punish you. That's not our job. So, no, I never got spanked. I don't even remember ever getting scolded or yelled at. It was more just like, how did that work out for you? And it's happens to this day. So all that to say, um, I'm still doing it. I mean, I'll be 52 in November and I'm still living that unschooled life. Like I wake up every day. I'm like, what do I want to do today? What would be the most fun that would make the biggest impact? And if it doesn't make an impact, it's really not very fun. And if it's not fun, then how can it make an impact? And so those are the sort of lenses that that I look.

So I'm curious, were your parents the same way with your siblings? Did they give them the same level of freedom? And do they. As adults, do they have the same mentality that you have, or did they take like, um, I guess a different approach or a new variant on it? It's a great question. They, I have 3 brothers and a sister. Um, they all have families, um. They, each one of them is so uniquely themselves. Which means that we went in 5 totally different directions because there's no, you know, homogeneous like this is what the elder family is going to do. Yeah, it's not, yeah, exactly, you know, this is not like the Dutton ranch like you're gonna be a cowboy, you know, it's like do do you do you and so we went in very different directions, um, and yet we're just just unified by this, this, um, I guess appreciation of Each other's gifts and strengths and where we have differences, they're just not a big deal. It's and it's, it's beautiful to see.

I'm, I'm curious. So they basically use life as the disciplinary tool, like let life show you the boundaries. But in the house, like if you did something you weren't supposed to, was there disciplinary actions in that? Like there's certain things you gotta like respect your mom or do this, or those were never issues because you had freedom. So everybody kind of got along. That's, I, I just got chills, man. That's such a, it's such a, there's a lot of nuance in that question. Most, um, like most humans in general, uh, since the Civil War have gone through a public schooling system, which is specifically designed to above all else, create a fixed habit of reaction to authority, which implies the existence of an authority, which is total bullshit. There is literally no such thing as absolute authority outside of nature, natural law. So most parents. Even if and most adults, even if they don't have kids, still somehow there's like this this this vestigial memory of being in school and like what's the right thing to do.

I will look around and see what everybody else is doing to not get in trouble or to get what they want, and I'm gonna watch that authority figure and see what do they rewarded, what do they punish, and people grow up with that and then they become an adult, allegedly, and then they project that same thing back on the kids like, oh shit, if they're not like corrected and motivated and rewarded and bribed and, you know, threatened a little, if they, if that didn't happen, what would happen to the kid? This is what happens to the kid. You become yourself. And so, The, the, the innate desire to connect with people that you love and care about. it eliminates this, this, you know, twisted sort of social game of like how do I manipulate, how do I get what I want? How do I put on a smiling face for mom and then a serious face for dad like there wasn't there. We squabbled all the time, but they would like sort it out. Like my, my two of my brothers would get in these just raging fights and My parents would just say, go in the front yard.

And duke it out, duke it out to like do what you need to do. And there were a handful of times where um I experienced conflict with my father where uh like when I was 16, he was like, you know, you're you're, you're doing great and you're gonna get your GED like at least do that. And I wanted so badly to please him cause it's the first time, one of the first times that that I or the one of the only times that I remember him saying, you know, this is what I want you to do. But by then, I had already become the product of the childhood that he and my mom created. And I remember cracking open that GED book and feeling completely retarded and I was like, this makes no sense, none of it interests me. I'm gonna go drill my reverse sidekick on the heavy bag in the backyard cause that's what I was doing, that's what I loved. And so I kept avoiding it, kept avoiding it, avoiding it, and, uh, and then finally I was like, Dad, I'm not getting my. And then I moved out when I was 17 and that experience.

I know that that I believe that it caused him a lot of concern. Because he went to Catholic University up north, uh, he's a school teacher, was so outside of the system and yet worked within the system is incredible. But I know, I believe that that that hurt him, you know, to not be listened to by his son. Um, but it just led to so many other things and a couple of, well, many years ago I guess now, um, we're talking about business and I shared with him how much I made and he just Just kind of thought about it. He said that that's a Yeah, that's more than I think any 4 years of my life put together. And he was like, so that's what you made this year. I said, that's what I made this month, Dad. And then he just kind of looked at me, said, You're gonna be OK. Fucking 46 years old, Dad. I'm gonna be fine. That is such a gift, um.

When I moved, you know, I, I had a place downtown at at 6G, badass condos, 60th floor, tallest building, it was wonderful. Um, I moved out of there, moved in with my dad and got to live with him for two months while he was dying, and it was booked. Can you tell us more about that experience because so many people don't see death as a gift because it. It's, there's two sides to that coin, right? There's a lot of I don't see, I don't see at all. Yeah, it's, it's a subscription. Like, and I, I believed that my whole life. Like it wasn't a book or anything. Books that I read, substances that I experienced, um, sober experiences of near death, every single one is just confirmation. No, it wasn't revelation like oh my God, this is amazing. It was like, no, we can't fucking die. Like take off shoes, put on shoes, you take off your shirt, put on your shirt, take off clothes, put on clothes. You know, get in this car, get out of that car, get in that truck, get out of that truck, but there's a, there's a, there's an us that's doing all those things. Go up one dimension, it's the same fucking thing with our soul. It's putting on this body and like 00 wow, this is cool and it's like we fucking won the we our souls on easy level like straight white North American male.

Like, make it as easy as possible. Won the lottery on that one. Well, we'll see. I mean, we'll see what happens. Yeah, I don't know. So far, I mean, we could end up being the hunted ones wearing the bonnets with the fucking the hand. What's the, what's the male version of? Yeah, what's the male version of a handmaid? Handman sounds awful. No, but I, I, um, I've never believed in death, man. I've never been able to take it seriously. I, you know, I had the childhood fears of like, oh, I'm, you know, I was driving my riding my bike one time and there's a a dead squirrel on the side of the road, you know, and I'm this little feral, you know, 78 year old kid. I pull up off the bike, look at the squirrel, and it was dead and I'm like something's not connecting in my mind here. It looks like a squirrel. But what I know of as this thing called squirrel is this lively jumping, chattering, you know, eating nuts, fucking throwing them at you like that's that thing is squirrel. This is not squirrel, and I remember sitting there I'm puzzled and the fucking universe is so perfect.

I'm looking at this thing, having this little conversation in my eight year old brain like it looks like a squirrel, but it's not a squirrel. And at that moment there's some wind blowing and there's like leaves blowing by and a candy bar wrapper blows over the body of the squirrel. I'll never forget it's a Butterfinger wrapper and this this candy bar wrapper blows over the body of the squirrel and I was like, oh. That's not the squirrel. That's the wrapper for the squirrel. That's just the wrapper, but the essence of the squirrel is not there. And so that really solidified something for me. And then years later when, um, one of the matches that I was in. Um, I ended up Gloriously hospitalized with a collapsed lung. I was just laying in the hospital bed, my left lung has collapsed, and it's like, this is the worst night of my life. I just got my ass beat in front of everybody. Dude is 30 pounds heavier, but it's a no rules, no weight limit, no time limit competition, so, that's fair. Plus his corner had covered him in in uh Vaseline, so I couldn't take him down. So, it was, it was beating. I got so beat up.

And I'm laying in the hospital bed. I'm like. And I'm looking up at the hospital lights and I'm asking myself like how am I? Like am I OK? And the answer that came in was, I'm fine. And I'm like, well, who's the me that got his ass beat, worst night of his life, hospitalized, who knows what the medical bills are gonna be? Probably not gonna have any karate students left after watching their instructor get his ass kicked. My family is traumatized cause my whole family was there. My little kid sisters just watching me get mauled. And so these thoughts are going through my mind. Well, that's the me that got his ass kicked, but who's the me that's fine? It was like clicking a hyperlink on like cosmic Google, and it was totally sober. This is like almost 20 years before I did any kind of substances. It was just a, a, a native experience and looking there at the lights and I'm having this. Wasn't even a conversation. It just felt like instructions. It was, it was that you have a body, but you're not your body. And then I remember the squirrel. I was like, oh, OK, these bodies are the wrappers, but then what's the What's the candy bar? And it was so, so clean, it was so simple is that you're what you guys call energy, but it's, it's a very specialized energy. It's a very personalized energy and every one of your energy frequency signatures is unique and it's in, it's animating your body.

And at some point it will withdraw and the body will just collapse and disintegrate, but then that will continue on and I'm having this. Experience while I'm looking up at the hospital lights and it's crazy pain, and then it just hit me like that bulb, the light bulb is illuminated cause there's electricity flowing through it. But if you turn the switch and you withdraw the electricity, the bulb goes dark, but it's the same bulb, weighs exactly the same, same molecular composition, like everything about that bulb is the same, it's just either lit up or not lit up. And when that energy withdraws, nothing, you can't, nothing can happen to energy, it just reroutes, it goes somewhere else. And I didn't realize it for for probably a couple of years, but that was the day that I stopped indulging consciously in in irrational fear, including this illusion of the fear of death. We, we can't die and all the, all the, I don't want, I can't judge and I won't judge anybody else's experience, um, but I've I've worked with a lot of people through this. I've had so many people have come into the work that we're doing with grief and trauma and, and.

Like the fear of future sadness and the, the fear of the pain of past sad events and they're just like these bags of wounds, man, and I've been there, but it's all that's voluntary too and when we When I got connected to that that reality that we that we are not our bodies. And that we're eternal Like we're fucking infinite light beings. We're eternal. We always have been, we are now, we always will be because even that just implies the illusion of time and time is a very local to this dimension and it's you go change a few dimensions, it doesn't behave the same way. So I couldn't, I could never take it seriously, and I went to a funeral is one of my, my, uh, employees actually. She, she passed away of cancer and I remember going to her funeral. I was like, I'm here for them because like I'm the boss, but I'm also like she's fine. She's fine. Like she's gone, body's gone, she's more her than ever.

And that's, it's a tough concept if somebody isn't asking for it, so I never share it because it's, it sounds callous or it's a weird thing to just volunteer casually over drinks. So you guys know what's in it, by the way. But it's, it's it in my experience it it removed any fear of dying and it's like then that. Sort of corresponded with another philosophy of, um, since I was a kid, I've always figured I would live for a long time, like have a body for a long time. I remember reading the Guinness Book of World Records when I was a kid and the oldest person was like 118 or whatever at the time. I just remember looking at that thinking, That's it. Amateur. I just, I don't know, man. I was like I knew that I was gonna live a long time and so then the, you know, the number 150 started floating around. I thought that sounds pretty cool. And then I started thinking, well, what kills people? Well, I'm not gonna die of accidents cause there are no accidents. Every single thing that happens to somebody's life is a co-creation, so I'm not gonna create any accidents. Um, I've created a bunch, so I know how to create them, and I know the preceding thoughts and energies and expectations that create them, but they're not accidental, so I'll just not do that. And uh what else kills people? Stress. And since stress is perceptual, why don't I just work on developing superior perceptions.

Compared to where I was at yesterday and see this world through a little more expanded lens, and Then your stress goes away. And even when you're in the gnarliest of situations, you got, you have that connection to the like we're right now we're these like cosmic Xbox characters, but our soul is like, ah yeah, and it doesn't matter what you go through. And this is why I, this is, I'm very unpopular, which I'm happy with in a lot of spiritual communities because I don't indulge in trauma bonding, you know, in the trauma industrial complex, trauma informed coaches who inform you of your trauma. It's like what? Yeah, but what that thing happened when you were a kid and the Catholic priest, he just put his pee pee in your butthole and so bad and your soul's going like, yeah, go to church, don't go in there, don't, ah, get fucked in the ass by a priest. Oh man, OK, well, level up. We'll spend the next couple of years unpacking that. Your soul doesn't care. Like your soul is fucking invincible. Meanwhile, the soul of the Catholic priest is over there completely disconnected from divinity.

Indulging in this airplane mode behavior, completely disconnected, goes and fucks a kid, and it's like, that's a horrible life too. So there are ultimately no victims. And we're, we're all playing this game with each other, and, and I have so much love for the people who choose consciously or unconsciously to be so disconnected from their heart and so disconnected from God and so disconnected from love that they think the only way that they could be safe is to try and control other people. Like that's hell on earth, man. So when I see people who are acting out the role of oppressor or agent or um whatever, you know, anybody who claims to have or believes they have authority over another person who can then tell them what to do. Firstly, I'm like, you went to public school, didn't you? But also I'm like man it sucks to be you and I just have love and compassion for those people and it's it's a I'm very excited about this conversation for a lot of reasons, but partly because I've been waiting a long time for life to catch up, and I've felt like I've been on the outside for a long time, and it now feels like a lot of this stuff is becoming more More people are open to it and you guys are certainly on the leading edge. So this is cool to have this.

Yeah man, I mean, there's so much to unpack out of all that. I don't know what I just said. Well, I don't know, I blacked out too. It's like the scene in, in, uh, old school when Will Ferrell debates James Carville. Oh yeah, and he just goes and he just goes blank and wins. According to the research, what happened? I just blacked out. Well, I wanna know what, what were like the couple of things that you wanted to touch on. I'll tell you and then we'll let him just like decide where to go. So I have a couple of things too. I'm like, shit. Yeah, well, OK. So I'm curious about You're saying that you're waiting for life to catch up and so now for the world to catch up. So I guess you're saying like you're waiting for the world and the, and the, I guess the consciousness of the world to start seeing things the way you saw them as well. And, and by the world, I, I'm not a, I'm not an idealist who says like the world should be change the world, quote unquote. I mean, I did, but like, I did, I did, I do remember we are the world from the 80s. We are super gay. It's like y'all doing with that money, really. Then when I saw Bob Dylan walked out, I was like. Um, no, it, it's, it's more so it's, it's lonely, man, and, and, and I shoes off, boys, now we're talking. Anybody got any the old guy was shooting fresh, fresh petties. Yeah, no, that's gonna be screenshotted by some sicko out there now we're gonna end up.

And OnlyFans with like, you guys can't screenshot this because you got to pay for these fees. Well, my affidavit of status actually forbids that lawfully and legally. So if somebody ever uses any piece of my image without my consent, they're subject to my fee schedule. OK. Do we have your consent to post this? This, yes, but just no OnlyFans. OK. Got it. No virtual AI. No, no, no, no gay AI porn, no gay furry, you know, roleplaying. OK, well, that really shoots our market. Great, great episode. Yeah, how are we gonna market this? It's 2/3 of our audience. Exactly. That was our whole marketing budget. OK, what were the things you were gonna go into like. When you touched on When you're able, like the thing that allows you to live longer is the second component, lack of stress, lack of stress, well, lack of distress, and you said by shifting kind of like perception, yeah, your perception. I wanted to go on that, but I also still want to go back to the story of you spending time with your dad. So wherever, yeah, let's go there. Yeah, let's go there. Um, do you guys have any nicotine by chance?

No, I have some caffeine, your bamate, uh, if you want, do you? He's got nicotine. Nice. Yeah, I'm, I'm a I've, I've practiced, thanks, dude. I've practiced something called vice rotation for a while where it's like you never, you never stick with one vice for, for too long. You can never be pinned down as an addict. Yeah, yeah, well, it's ultimate addict behavior, really. Yeah, but you're controlling the perception of it. So I'll use this thing. You're like, no, wean off that thing. I haven't done nicotine in months, but I'll just rotation. Yeah, well, the ultimate, one of the ultimate addictions is sobriety. It's like people are so addicted to being sober. It's like Chill out. Anyway, not legal advice or medical advice for God's sake. Um, thank you. Uh, so I, I moved in with my dad, um, May 16th of, uh, this year, 2025, completely unlooked for. Um, I've been getting the feeling for a while that I was gonna leave downtown and then Things started to like just become unignorable, like business is getting wonky and I was like, man, something's up. So I thought maybe I'm supposed to travel or, you know, be nomadic again. The day after I put in notice.

At 6G that I was, you know, OK, I'm done, um. The next day I got a text from one of my brothers and he said, man, dad's dad's fate passed. It's like He said, so are you going to move in with Dad? Like holy shit. I just started crying. I was like this is perfect. Yes. So I put most of my stuff in storage, moved down there. And was able to be with him. Um, I wasn't staying there all the time. I still come back to Austin for clients and, and projects and But it was, it was so It was so incredible to be at at that slower speed. Partly cause he's just always lived a simple life and he is the most productive person I've ever met. Like I've never knew him to be idle, like at all. He'd take a nap once in a while for like 30 minutes and that was it. But he's always making things. He was always doing things for people.

And So when Parkinson's began to set in, uh, he was diagnosed 14 years ago. Um, Like that was the hardest part For for me, I can't speak for for my siblings or for my mom. Um, but getting to be with him. And just his, his, his pace of life. Like it had to be so intentional because, you know, his body's, you know, not, not reliable. His speech is just so hard for his speech to get out. And you could tell it was just maddening for him cause he's this brilliant guy, like absolutely brilliant and so compassionate and just wants to do things for people and now he can't get a word out and we would just be sitting there and we'd be sharing a meal or, you know, going for a walk down to the post office and, you know, I'd have his he'd have his walker and um and he'd want to say something and he would just look at me and he would just like And his face is kind of frozen because of Parkinson's. You just see the fucking fire in his eyes and he's pissed, you know, he's like, You just can't get the word out.

And it was so incredible to just like just love him, you know, and just like. Got it, Dad. Take all your time. And then he would, you know, kind of, and then he would get it out and then, and then you'd you'd be on a roll. But he told me at one time he said, He said it's, it's very frustrating to, to know what I want to say and not be able to say it. And I just told him, I said, Dad, I, as far as I remember for like 1st 4 years of my life, I didn't talk either and you're pretty patient with me. So Full circle. And um A couple of years ago, I was, I was visiting him and he was sharing some regrets that he had about, you know, stuff from growing up and I said, Dad, I, I As I told you guys, I, I can't speak for, for my brothers or my sister, um, but those things that you just mentioned that you have a regret around. Like there were some of the best things that ever happened to me.

Because I got to take The positive parts of that. Like seeing you live your principles. Seeing what it looks like when somebody cares about something more than themselves, even more than their family. And I got to take that. And turn that into a central part of my life. And also like I got to practice forgiveness and I got to learn what it's like to love even if the impact wasn't what you intended. And he just He just kind of smiled and Then he drops this on me. He says, Says, I, I don't know if I taught you how to live well. But I intend to teach you how to die well. I was like, good one, Dad, god damn it. Wow, that's a gift, dude, that's a gift. It was incredible. And then fast that was a couple of years ago. Fast forward, I'm now living with him.

And, uh, you know, took a new couple of doctors off, uh, doctor's appointments and I've got 2 brothers and their families that live in San Antonio, so we'd see them and the whole family flew in for a, a really nice time, a couple of days, um, a few months ago, and we really felt like that was it and that was like right when I first moved in and so I thought it was like now and I'd go in and check on in the morning and He's breathing, OK. And then that's just persisting for like weeks. I'm like, OK, so he's not like it's not gonna happen right now, but he had been um researching something called VED, which is voluntary voluntarily stopping eating and drinking. And uh he had a book on it and it says, he said voluntarily stopping eating and drinking, a widely available method to accelerate the dying process. I'm like, It's a great copy. It is indeed widely available. Like, basically, anybody on earth can do this.

And uh so he's researching it and what to expect and And um then we, we decided as a he decided and as a family, we decided that it was time to start hospice at home. So, we had a great, great outfit, uh, devoted hospice and um You know, they brought over the bed, it's got the controls and, um, you know, brought Meds if he needed them, um, you know, diapers cause at some point he's not gonna have the energy to get out of bed and Then they send a social worker to like ask some questions and then they brought a chaplain, which is hilarious because my dad is not religious in any way at all. So she's asking him, it was my mom was there and my dad and my brother um and me and this social worker or the chaplain and the chaplain says, uh, She said, so, um, do you have any religious beliefs? He's just sitting there, he goes, no.

That was that and she's like, well, any spiritual beliefs? And he said, I think everything is on its way from someplace to someplace. Deep and she was like, OK, so you're good. He's like, yes. And that was that. She left. As soon as she left, my mom looks at my dad. She says, when do you want to start the process? He just thought for a second, he said, Right now My brother and I both had the same idea. He grabbed his phone, screenshotted the time, I started a timer. And um that was 11:26 a.m. July 21st. And my brother from Chicago flew in, my sister flew in from LA. And for 11 days, we had to be in the house with it. And everybody is so our family is so fucking awesome, man. Everybody just knew what everybody else needed. There was never encroachment, there was never negligence, that everybody just flowed. So, you know, the two brothers that lived there, they, they had their homes. Uh, my brother from Chicago, he'd stay there and then he's like, OK, I need some space. He'd get a hotel. My sister is awesome.

And um That process of Like I, I took a picture and, and he very explicitly said, I don't want any pictures, no videos, like you guys take pictures of whatever you want, but like this is my basically this is my experience. He would never say that. He would never ever assert himself like that, but I did take a picture of um of his his last cup of coffee and There's so many little moments like that. So he wasn't eating, wasn't drinking, and um he had had us read a chapter in this feasthead book, bookmarked it he's like, you guys read that part. And it basically said that when somebody is going through this process that there's a chance that they'll be so, you know, like in between worlds and they'll forget why they're not drinking and they'll forget why they're not eating and they'll ask for water. And he, he pointed that like, Do you guys remember that?

So It was day 10. And uh I was there, 2 of my brothers were there and And I went in to check on it and he was, you know, he would sign. So, you know, if he needed, but we had like Point 25 or 0.025, you know, morphine um ampules and when the pain got a lot, he would ask for one, but he asked for like 4 over the whole time. Um, and he'd ask for the, you know, window to be open so he could turn the AC off, you know, little things. But I went in there and I just sat next to him and, you know, just grabbed his hand and, and he, he was, he was starting to see things. He was, he was like, go in there. And then he, he just kind of turned and looked at me. It's like this. He goes it's like, Yeah It's like that. Hm Oh fuck.

I is It was hard. And um But I just grabbed his hand. I said, Dad, we can't give you. Can't do it. And then he just goes like this, just goes. He passed the test. I'm like, holy shit, man. And I would go out like, huh, and then somebody else would go in. It was perfect and he would test them too. Well, probably so. I, and I, I don't, I, I know him. It wasn't a test. It was more just like he like remembered either he remembered or, or he's just that, you know, he, he was like fine. He had no choice but to be at peace with it. That's my story, um, and then finally it was, uh, it was, it was. Uh, August 1st. And we could just see his, his breathing was really slowing down and he was, he was not lucid, um. It, it, it was so incredible, man. He had, he was in and out for like those last two days, even to the point of wanting to get up and he couldn't even, he couldn't stand. So we would like hold him and like carry him as and, and like he'd move his feet and he'd want to go around the house and he sat down at his old typewriter and was trying to type us something and it made no sense at all. And then after that he would like reach down to the floor and start doing that and later I was like, oh, he's petting his dog.

Well, the dog that died a couple of years ago. You'd be in bed and Just look up and take his head. Putting on a hat or something and then his feet were going like this and my mom was like, he's riding his bike. It's like God. So we're just watching him just just in and out and then finally he was, he was, his eyes were closed and we're just, we were all in the room with him and we just watched his breathing just slow and um his heartbeat is getting weaker and And, uh, There was a, there was a, you could feel it, like. The amount of love is indescribable. My experience. And he died at 3:51 p.m. August 1st. In the same room that a couple of my siblings were born in. And I remember being, I was a kid, it's all home births. I was the only one born at a hospital. They were all born at home. I watched all of my siblings enter this world.

And it was the exact same frequency. Of him leaving this one. And uh my brother. Who's a it's a firefighter, uh, had a stethoscope, checked him and checked his watch. And uh and we were just all just so still and silent. And then, uh, and everybody just knew what to do. And my mom and my sister began to anoint his body in oil. And uh My brothers went to the truck and uh put the back seat up. And I went in the kitchen. Did some Woo stuff, um. And then we wrapped his body in a sheet. My mom and sister had wrapped his jaw in gauze, so he wasn't. Presentable. He wanted to be cremated in uh one of his favorite t-shirts, Vietnam Veterans Against the War. It's a big organization he's part of.

Folded his t-shirt up, put it on his chest. And um Wrap the sheet in a tarp, duct tape the tarp. And then I grabbed his head and shoulders and my other brother grabbed his legs and we picked him up and carried his body through the living room, down the front steps, out the front yard, put him in the back of the truck, back seat, then Two of my brothers drove that truck and then the rest of us in another one. We drove way deep south side San Antonio to this funeral home that he had picked out to to be cremated at. And the whole time, man, we're just The the love is indescribable. I mean, I don't know if any of your audience or you guys have ever heard of MDMA. It's a supplement, um. This puts that shit to shame. Like That's why people do drugs, is to feel what's actually always available. Then we get there, then we all just start laughing cause it was like this 3 acre lot, rural South Texas, chickens running around everywhere, Ghostbusters looking hearse in the front. There's a horse on the other side of the fence and we're just like laughing like he would love this.

And we got his body, put it on the gurney, um, had a great conversation with the funeral director, really good dude, and, uh, and then my brother said, our, our dad had a titanium rod in his leg because he, he fell a couple of years ago. He said, we, we want that. I was like, all right, it might be a little, you know, twisted from the from the the heat from the fire, but we'll get it back to you. And then we all just kissed his head and got back in our trucks and go back home and had dinner. And And I want to be very Aware and, and, and Observant to the fact that my experience of this is mine. This story that I'm sharing is my storage. My siblings all have their their version. Uh, my mom has her version of it. But in the In the days that followed. Um There's never a sense that he was gone.

If if anything for me, the sense that he was gone was when Parkinson's started to set in. And that's when I got to confront like oh shit, my dad's gonna fucking die. And the sadness and the grief and loss and the uh But I remember being a kid And being so scared that my parents are going to die. Like I wasn't afraid of death. I didn't even think death is real, but my parents, like I don't want, you know, normal. And I remember being a kid and for whatever reason, man, my little homeschooled Tom Sawyer brain figured out that or figured that the best thing to do if I'm afraid of this sadness is to feel as much of it as I can. So I would be laying in bed 9 years old and imagining my parents dead. Like I would just try and picture them in a coffin and like make myself as sad as I could just to like get it over with. And I would, I would, I remember telling myself like that's, you know, you could be sadder. Like you, there's more like there's more cause I'd already like I was a kid training taekwondo, so I understood repetition and the love of the intensity of it. Somehow my brain connected that to emotions. It's like no, be sadder man, be sadder.

And I would just be bawling silently because our family had all slept in the same room, this little trailer that we lived in for a while, and I didn't want to wake them, but I was like, make more, more, let me feel more. And that's a big part of what stimulated so much of my curiosity about life and death and like what is this whole thing is to be ready for for him. And then eventually for my mom. So when it actually happened, I mean, nothing prepares you for it, you know, it's not like you could practice and visualize and all this, but It was so Yeah I mean just love like the the I've I've believed and and have taught, you know, shared my experience of this for a long time that sadness is really just love looking for a home. And if we don't express that love nor allow ourselves to receive that love. Then sadness is the byproduct. Sadness is the signal that you're just not giving love. And you're not receiving Especially for men, way easier, easier to give than to receive. How are you? Good. How about you? Good. Let's go produce.

But when we're producing, we just want love. We want appreciation, we want recognition, we want money, but why do we want money? Cause it means that we can protect and provide and be loved. It's it's so simple. And so there's there's many moments where, um, like I had one a couple of days ago, I was, I was at the house. And uh I could, I could feel a lot of energy moving like, all right, go do this. So I went and sat in the room that he that he passed in. sat down in the chair and uh I'm sure you guys do this. But there's like pieces of music, you know, that you can use to like really get in the vibe. And there's a track, it's on the, it's on Spotify. It's a Johns Hopkins psychedelic playlist actually great playlist. But there's a track in there and it's like some 16th century hymn and it's called O Magnum Mysterium and it's got chills again, man. And there's so many beautiful versions of it. The, the vocal version, it's all in Latin, but it's about the animals that were in the manger. Jesus born.

And it's about the animals. It kind of makes no sense, but it's about Jesus and it's about the animals and it's the way it's written even. It's like copywriters should check this shit out cause there's open loops in this hymn that then get closed and callbacks and it's like this is crazy. But the, the, um, the instrumental version is just all strings and horns and so I just, I just pressed play and I sat in that chair. And just fucking just let it go and I'm sobbing, man, just like like like when I was a kid, like 9 years old, just let it out and then I get this feeling in my body like you shouldn't do this sitting like like do it like a man like like grief like a fucking man. So I stood up and I just put my chest. And it's harder to sob when your chest is open, but if you can do it, man, if you can ever get there, like sob while your chest is open and your chin is up and you're looking up and your arms are back, whole different level. And what came up was all these memories of Like when I was a kid and and like how.

Thoroughly you love when you're a kid. Like It's like the fiercest innocence. Unconditional. Like you just, you just love because you, you are, you just love. And I remember the first girl I had a crush on and I was like she was my first love and then I was, we were like friends growing up and then we both like went through puberty together and one day I was like, oh my God, like what just happened and I was going to go to her house. I was like 1516, I think I was 16 because I had a car. And I was going to go to her house and like bring her flowers and just tell her how I felt. I get there and I've grown up in her house basically, you know, our families are very close. And I walked in and she's like, hey Jessie and her parents are there and she's like, I want you to meet this guy. Fucking Kevin. Fucking Kevin, dude. It's always a Kevin. And I was like, hi. And she gives me a hug and I'm just like an instant erection, you know. And he's like, oh, how's it going? Oh, she's told me so much about you. Can't say the same.

And they're like, do you want to stay for dinner? They're, they're going out, but do you want to stay for dinner? I'm like, no, no, I just want to stop by and say hi. And luckily I'd left the flowers in the car. And I went back in the car and I was like, god damn it. And that was my first heartbreak. And I felt that gap between that childlike love and the yearning of this young man, 16 year old kid with that same love. Boom, denied. And that memory is coming up and I'm just like let it out. And then it was like it was like a parade of heartbreak. The time I loved this one, time I loved that one, time I loved that. Nope, nope, nope. And I'm like, let it out, let it out. And then everything just got quiet and then it was a message which I'd received many times before, but that you, you can't lose love. You can only close your heart And When your heart closes.

Then you attract close-hearted experiences. You attract people that can't receive the love that you're not feeling. But when you open your heart and you surrender to that shit. Which Very hard, very uncommon, especially with so many distractions and False idols and and everything. But I'm standing there as this fucking track is just reaching a crescendo and I'm just like I'm gonna, I'm gonna go until there isn't any more and I just let it all out and then just finished and I looked in the mirror, he had this, this dresser. I looked in the mirror and I saw my nine year old. And I saw this 16 year old. And I saw all the other versions like like my face was like a parade. I was like this guy, this guy, this guy. And I felt like I like a a weight was just off my chest. Fuck man. And that's that for me and I don't like the word lessons because it implies like public school, but um Experiences The experience of my father.

Being released or releasing himself from his physical body that had played its part. And in my belief system just completely reuniting with the fullness of of what he really is like final form. And the bliss that I know comes from that. Like I'm so happy for him to get to have that experience and I don't have any need or a sign or, you know, whatever. It's like I know he's good, he's always here. His principles live on in me and it's been a Somewhat brutal but beautiful experience of shedding everything that's not those principles. And It was uh yesterday. I was down at uh Sun Life Organics. And I was going to meet somebody and I had had a few, few minutes, so I'm sitting down and I'm feeling that love again.

I was like, all right, well I'm gonna hit that track again. I'm gonna put that track on and just go for love this time and let it be sadness that becomes love or just love that becomes more love. I don't care. So I put in my my headphones, press play, and I'm sitting right by ABBA and Sun Life, that little thoroughfare, beautiful place. So I'm sitting in one of those chairs. And you know I've got my journal in case anything comes through and I'm listening to this and the fucking tears just start flowing, but it was like I felt like I was lifting off the chair. Like it was just this light experience. And I'm just looking at the fucking sky. Everything is so beautiful and tears are pouring down my face. And that right at that crescendo, I go to open my journal to write and I look at the page that I, the blank page that I had turned to. was The three digits that are his address, which are very meaningful in our family. Like my sister has a tattoo of those numbers and um like it's just it's it's the house we grew up in and I turned the page and that's the page of the journal is those 3 numbers.

As the fucking song is hitting that same crescendo and I was like I get it I get it I get it. And That was yesterday and I've, I've been Just enjoying it, not even processing, just enjoying it and getting so connected back to that childlike feeling of love, that innocence of, of what it's like to be in that, and I could just see how much of my life. Relationally has been avoidant because of the fear of getting hurt, which is In no way original, but the way that I dealt with that when I wasn't in a relationship, I was like, well, I got this strong provider instinct and, you know, I want to be like a light in a dark place. Where's a dark place that I could go be a light in? Strip clubs, obviously. So, I've spent tons of time in strip clubs. And I recognize and I've known it, but it was like really sunk in that that that's that's just the ultimate delay mechanism.

It's not like you don't know that or you go to a strip club, you're like I'm looking for love. No, you're not. I mean, it's not gonna happen. Probably. But just to see all of that with love. And to see all the people whose whose lives I've gotten to touch and who's who have touched my life. And to feel just the, the ultimate rightness of it, that there's no like you can't get it wrong. Wait, hold on. So what was the point of being in the strip clubs? Uh, well, just that that was, uh, it was like. Avoidance on steroids. Because it's going there and having proximity and being like this protector provider sort of, you know, temporary thing, but it's anti-intimacy. It's the exact opposite of intimacy. And And it's a part of this human experience. And I've, I've learned a long time ago. Like, not just not to judge experiences. As long as nobody's getting hurt and as long as you're not getting hurt.

Like we've, we've had this conversation many times, do no harm, take no shit, and that's a big bandwidth. And so I've lived my entire life between those two barriers, but I also recognize because of this, this awareness awakening, um, And maybe it's not harm, but it's unnecessary pain. Unnecessary pain for sure that I was creating for myself, which then by default has to create pain for others. And I recognize that and I, I don't do regrets. Um, I don't, I just, I don't find them useful, um. But I can, I can feel remorse. I can feel the, the like, oh, it's just like a, like a tenderness, you know, for anybody that's involved, for me feeling oh what we're actually trying to get at is love. Like that's all we want. And My dad's um Legendary death.

was The the the most peaceful. Beautiful, intense, at times just so fucking savage. And it was just this catalyst, this catalyst for, for this remembrance. It's all love and The the energy that's coming from that, um, like I'm, I'm surrendered to it. Like whatever that wants me to do is what I'm gonna. Mm. Well, yeah, thank you for sharing. Thank you guys. That was you took us on a ride, man. I think what really stands out to me in that story, zooming out at it is. The full circle aspect of it where your parents gave you this freedom as a kid and it was go learn your lessons, go be you. And then fast forward many years, you're then giving the same to your father in his last few years and you have this, just this compassion and love for him to have his experience, whatever that is.

And a great connection and you telling us what's going through your mind and how you're perceiving all of it makes me wonder. Rewind 50 years. What were your parents thinking as they were giving you that ultimate freedom? What were the, the concerns, the thoughts, because, you know, they have to let you go be you and, and do seemingly dumb shit as a kid, which we're gonna do. What were their concerns? What were their thoughts and how are they perceiving this whole thing, you know, that's a. Think about that. Yeah, like put me in their shoes. I, I, there's another, it's like one of our family stories, um. And, and they both have shared this many times as, as, you know, we've talked about our individual life paths and the roles that we play in each other's lives. And according to them, again, I was too little to remember, but I was probably 2 or 3. And we must have been in, in uh We must have been in Long Island. That's where my mom is from.

And so we're on the beach and there's this blanket and my mom's sitting down, my dad's sitting down, the water's there and I'm there. According to them, I get up and I like start walking towards the water. And They They checked in with each other. And they're, they're basically like how far do we want to let him go. Before we Intervene. And they both decided then and there that we're not going to intervene. Like He'll come back when he's ready to come back and according to them, I went down to the water and then and then just started walking up the beach. And as I walked up the beach, I would turn and look at them. And And in my recollection of this, this story, um, they, they didn't, they didn't encourage. They didn't, they didn't warn. They were totally neutral. They were just, they were just there. They were just watching.

And I believe um having worked with a lot of kids uh through martial arts and having a connection to that kid that that I was on that beach that walking down the beach and looking and seeing that you're still being observed by those that love and protect you it's just enough to know that they're there and then there's an empowerment that comes from that and so according to them, I just kept walking down the beach until I was almost out of sight. And they let me go. And then I just came back And through that experience of, of going to the edge, going to the edge, going to the edge, going to the edge, and never receiving a warning, be careful, watch out, watch out for the priests or whatever, none of that was there. So I got to truly have my own experience without any interference. Neither encouragement nor caution. And then when I came back of my own accord. That that pattern just continued to play out and my parents did an amazing job with with all five of us because as, you know, we've run lots of different, you know, my mom would call it experiments. You know, I'd have a brother who'd get in trouble for, you know, get busted with pot or something, um, and she'd be like, yeah, he's, he's just running some experiments. It was like ultimate love, man. And that, that led to a philosophy for me later where I, I was journaling one day.

And I, I love acronyms probably way too much. Like it's like Beautiful Mind sometimes. It's like everything is an acronym, but um, It just hit me one day. I'm like, oh love, and I just wrote it out and it's letting others voluntarily evolve. And I was like, damn. Also seems hyper avoidant, but there's good parts of it too. Yeah, I think the balancing act to it is because I'm picturing the story of you on the beach and your parents watching you. That's a great example because they're not putting a boundary on it and they're letting you love, right, evolve on your own. But you can sense their presence and their protection is still there, and that is the missing ingredient that if you don't have that, then it's abandonment. Bingo. And so if you are still, if you're still grounded, and you let your kid go do whatever, but know that you're there for them and they can always come back to safety, then there's this ability to go push the edge, push the edge, push the edge, and then you find your own boundary, and then you have this level of safety knowing that you can come back home at any time.

That's dude, that's, I never connected it like that. That's, that's it. That's it because it's the potential protection. It would be so different if you looked back and they were like on their phones or doing something else, right? They're like taking selfies, like, oh, I guess they don't give a shit. But the fact that they saw you, but they didn't give you a yes or a no, they just were here. Simple as that. Yeah, no, that's it, man. That's really cool, yeah. I can't imagine 99% of parents can do that easily. Maybe not, it certainly wasn't easy for my parents. Um, any parent can and practice, and that's the thing, but it also that that like my childhood was was the, the culmination of my parents' values and I can see now with with perspective, uh, my dad. Um, you know, very non-emotional. And but deeply, deeply compassionate. So he expressed love through actions. He expressed love through making things for people, not by saying I love you, not by saying great job, not by saying you're awesome, like, That was a big deal to hear something like that.

But he was, his, his love was expressed expressed through his actions. And my mom was so nourishing and so nurturing, and I can see now, uh, they, they divorced when I was 20, so they, they were divorced for 30 years before he passed. And I can see how And and this is my pure fiction. Imagination on my part, but I'm imagining that there are parts of her as a woman that needed more demonstration or words of affirmation or whatever it is, and he just didn't have that to give. And so my this sort of mostly came in through meditation that You know, my experience growing up from her that your feelings are valid, feelings are important, and it was also like the, you know, mid-seventies. So it's like we're listening to records that have lyrics like it's all right to cry, you know, like fucking folk guitar playing and I, I believe or maybe I just like to believe that she wanted to make sure that I got what he never got.

Because he had very intense parents and I, he never talked about his childhood. Like, so I, I can only imagine what, what that might have been like. And so I could see their their dynamic just worked so perfectly because Like they understood each other. And What they gave, gave us, um, was just the greatest gift. It's just the gift to just be yourself. So where does this All of these experiences. And that experience and, you know, through childhood and learning all these things, like, where are you now in your life? Like, how are you leading your life and what is your Like drive and mission, cause I think you said fun but impact. And so now we're here. What is that? It's a question that uh that I'm asking myself a lot lately because in um You know, that that childhood that led to martial arts as one of many activities that they were like, sure, try it, but that's the one that stuck. By the time I was 15, I got my black belt teaching at 16, moved out at 17, um, opened my first school when I was 23 and built this chain of schools, had great business partners, um, built truly industry transforming tools and, and training philosophies and Curriculum and all this stuff and then I sold in 2012. Along the way I'd gotten married and uh six months after the sale of the business, I was divorced and that was my first relationship that I was ever in. Like I was never, never dated, never had a girlfriend.

Did you take half after you sold the business? Uh, it wasn't half. It seems like perfect timing to she didn't initiate it to her great credit, she didn't take anything, um, but I willingly gave, um, and it was a combination of guilt, um, and, and, and concern, you know, I wanted her to be OK, but the sale of the business basically went to pay for the divorce. This was your instant family, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, she had 3 kids already when we got married. And so in in the couple of years following that 2013, well, mostly 2013, I had no idea what I was going to do. Because I knew it wasn't martial arts. I thought it might be like marketing or, you know, coaching or maybe I'm going to be a speaker. Looking back now, I see that pure ego. Like I wanted to be known as the guy who could help you make money. But then I was like, look at all these other guys who were like actually really good at it, but none of their stuff resonated with me. It felt hollow, you know, it felt like choreographing your sex life. You know, it's like for 18 seconds we're going to do this and after that, here's what's going to happen. It's like a decision tree. Like that's not, that's not, that's not creative. So I decided that I'm not going to force anything and it really was just going back to those childhood experiences, you know, what's interesting to me.

So I would just pursue my interests. So, I'd train jiu-jitsu, I'd ride my motorcycle or bike at the time, um, but whenever I had any money, I would just go to a conference cause I figured these are this is where my future is. And I would go to these conferences and I legit, like I was so naive. I legit thought that every single person I'm talking to at traffic and conversion or or I love marketing or wherever, I'm assuming everybody I'm talking to is making like a million dollars a minute cause they're online. Like I made millions our business made millions of dollars with brick and mortar locations with a finite number of people in a 3 mile radius. So if God, if you had the internet, you must be making a million dollars a minute. I literally thought that. So I would meet people and I would be like, Hi, how's it going? And I would just put this intense energy because I legit thought that they were billionaires. Like I'm, I'm retarded. I literally thought every single person was a billionaire. So I'm like, tell me about your business. And they're like, oh well, I do this thing and I sell courses. I was like, that's amazing. But how did you get into that? Cause I'm selfishly asking because I'm at zero and I want to know how.

They did it and that's how I learned to fight. That's how I learned to run a school. That's how I learned to teach. It's like, how did you do it? And like, can I, can I'll pay you if I can, but how do you do you do it? So I assumed everybody was way, way, way, way higher financially than they actually were. Turned out that that assumption from a peaceful, non-needy place is intoxicating for people. And then they started to feel like the version of them that I thought they were. And And then they would be like, well What do you do? And I would totally deflect. I would say about what? And they're like, ha ha, no, really, what do you do? I was like, well, I'm a former fighter. I learned that that's what people are like, whoa. Plus they look at you, you know, 6'2, 145, they're like, sure. Right. But if you fought, there's a gameness to it and people sense that. And I would just, I wouldn't know what to say. But I would basically just tell my story. I did this, I did this, and then I sold my business and no, now I'm just, I'm just here to support people.

And then that was the pitch and then people would start to say things like, well, how, how can we, how can we get together? And my very first client, um, awesome guy, uh, Kevin Thompson, um, just such a loving dude, great family guy, and, uh, he became my first client and he was, you know, paying me like $4500 a month to jump on a call once a week. And I knew enough not to undercharge. I also knew that that's the amount that I needed to pay my rent and my car payment. So, I was like, it's 4500 a month. And he was like, Deal overnight at a check and we worked together for over three years, month to month. That was 20 end of 2012, 2013. Yeah, and we worked together for a little longer. Uh, and then my second client was Garrett White, Wake Up warrior, and it was the same way like we just were in a conversation at the bar and then there was this kind of like All right, you're weird, you're different. And he flew to San Antonio and left as a client and invested 6 figures in my support in helping to Wire frame what became Wake Up Warrior.

So that that period, 2013. Literally 2 clients, um, and then another one would come in and then I started to figure out that what I was doing had value, but it wasn't value that I'd written down. It was value that was happening in real time by being curious and then drawing on this lifetime of experience and training people and martial arts and sales and I mean, you know, enrolled over 1000 people from high in the parking lot to come and try a class to pitch them a $14,000 martial arts membership. So, I knew how to sell. I just didn't know how to sell what I was doing. That then became uh that led to me making videos. And so I grabbed my phone one day. I just had a call with Kevin. He was happy, so, I make the the video and it was just something about, you know, look, you don't want money. You don't want a cooler house or a bigger car. You don't want the perfect person to treat you the perfect way. What you want is the way those things are going to make you feel and since it's the feeling that you really want, why not go for the feeling first?

And when you do that, this whole universe conspires to become the things that feel the way that you were feeling. And the universe is your dance partner, but you're leading. So go first and and feel it. And that was the gist of the video. I had 300 friends on Facebook. I shared that video a couple weeks later, I have more shares on the video than I had friends, and it took away the sadness of the divorce. Because I felt useful. I felt like, OK, there's some traction. So I called it a mind vitamin and then I just started making these mind vitamin videos and I was very open to that to that flow. What wherever I was, whatever I was doing, when I would feel a message coming, I would stop. I pull over on the side of the road and I just make a video and then that became an audience. It became ideas for courses. And so, September or November of 2013, I released a course called The Upgraded Life and uh that became the first of, I think now we're up to like 112 completely separate courses. Um, and along the way have been some incredible communities. um.

But in this moment now, I can clearly see why have I always been a serial course creator? Cause there's no commitment. Hm I'm gonna make a course, you're gonna love it, it's gonna blow your mind. You're gonna meet some other cool people, you're gonna pay me what you feel the course is worth and what I feel it's worth, and you're gonna get exactly what you paid for, and I'm gonna do my best to overdeliver, but after 8 weeks, We're complete I'm done And I'm free. And there that's the the double-edged sword. Because excessive freedom, we talked about this so much in Sigma University, excessive freedom is Hell, because it's absolute isolation. It's like you have so many choices that you're paralyzed. You're so free that you're a slave. On the other end of the spectrum, ultimate taking ultimate responsibility.

Deep devotion Absolute 100% commitment. Feels like restriction. It feels like being trapped. And I would feel that in the karate schools where I'm going to the same room every day for like 12 years and I felt trapped. I wanna travel, I wanna, I wanna meet different people, but I have to teach these classes and I love my students and I love the business, but I felt trapped. And then one day it hit me. It's like, well, I'm confined to this room, but this room is a vehicle that can take me and take everybody else where we want to be. So I just switched the perception in my mind from I'm trapped in this room to envisioning that business like a fighter jet and I'm a fighter pilot and I'm strapped in and I'm trapped in the plane, but I'm flying the fucking plane. So I can't move, but the plane can go wherever I want to go. That got me out of feeling trapped in my schools and business rocketed and then I was able to move laterally over to do what I'm doing now. But now it's so clear, like the avoidance of commitment.

Because of the fear of losing that losing that childlike, playful Ferris Bueller, you know, energy. Has also created incredible pain because for for any healthy, I, I will say man or woman, but I, I don't, we'll never know what women are fully feeling. Neither will they, which is why we all work so well together because we can just be equally confused at the same time. Shout out Alison Armstrong. She sat in that very chair. Yeah, yeah, no, I've told so many people about that interview, um, but I, I recognize that that the one of the greatest pains, um, is having this love to give and not having a place to put it. And so when I had, when I was married and I had a family and 3 stepkids and like they were my kids and their dad is awesome. I mean, he and I became really good friends. Um, and we lived in this beautiful house and I had a golf club membership and my wife did triathlons and was fucking amazing at it, like went to Kona World Championships. So, you know, the kids were all flying to Kona and the kids are cheering on mom and you know, back home the karate schools are humming and it was a fucking life, man. It was awesome.

Till it wasn't And I knew that martial arts wasn't my future. I knew that martial arts was a stepping stone to help me understand myself, understand people, understand basics of business, um. But I knew that that was done. And then when that was done, I really became conscious to the that the relationship was done too. And Since then, um, I've had some incredible relationships and have also had some some colossal colossal absolute dumpster fire of relationships. Largely because of me. Because when it starts to get a little too good or freedom is a little too threatened, mm, you're not quite like this perfect image that I have in my mind of this childhood I had, and that crush that if it would have gone the right way, would have been like this. So now I'm comparing you to that non-existent reverse ideal, and then every other high point of every other relationship, forget about the bullshit, forget about the drama, forget about the passive aggressiveness and the violence. Forget about that. I'm just gonna remember all these things and they're gonna get better.

As they get further in the past, and now I'm gonna project that onto you, and if you don't immediately measure up to my reverse high points, this can't work. That's exactly what I've done. The equation for constant sadness and disappointment. Basically, here you want to be constantly sad. Here's how. And so I'm very curious to see what happens with this new awakening and awareness. And so what am I gonna do next? Um, I'm gonna keep being me and I, I, I do feel like strategically, tactically. Um, it's very inspiring seeing this setup and, and what you guys are doing. Uh, I will bring the podcast back. I did it, I did 52 episodes, but they were all solo. Uh, the next one will be called, uh, Hero Doses, and it'll be interviews with people. That's a sick name. It's a great name. That's a great name. Yeah. Well, the first podcast was, it was just Jesse, very, very egoic. Um, and then we had long form, all original improv content, but then we had microdoses where there were like 8 to 10-minute clips. So those are really good.

Um, so Herodose podcast is gonna be a thing based on the names. There may need to be two fun guys, I think, I think Herose we need a merger. We need a merger, yeah, yeah, like, uh, just, just let the mycelium just like, like like the network collides. Just real quick, do you have a, do you have a YouTube or like where people could go check that out like now podcast is on Spotify. Yeah, I look up Jesse Elder, yeah. So the podcast is coming and um I'm like I'm born to be a teacher, uh, because I'm born to be a student and the way that I learned to be a student is to have no interference, pure free reign, follow my my inspiration, whatever I'm interested in, obsess over it until I develop some skill, achieve some sort of notable, hopefully spectacular result, um, that creates credibility. And then synthesize that into an entertaining, confronting, ultimately loving, but kind of ass kicking, um. Experience of learning so that people make real shifts in their lives that change their business and it changes their relationship, changes their feeling of their power, knowing that they are the power, that they have access to infinite power, um.

The message has been too big to put into something, which is why I've never been niched, um. But I think the next piece is Formalizing it, um, building a team using the entertainment model so that the talent only does the thing and then everybody else handles everything else. So, booking, promotion, um, I've, I've done multiple tours and they've, they've always been very pure, um, but I think having a like a residency in Austin, just having a consistent show that's different every night, but it will have certain themes, um, so like a weekly show and one of the, you know, decent venue, um, I think that that'll be, be something worth doing. And what would these shows be about? So, um, action philosophy and weaving in comedy, music, um, Because of my, my, the background in facilitation and the, the immediacy of making something experiential, not just, you know, being entertained, um, is something that I've that I've learned to do and that I've seen great impact in, in audiences. Um, I was speaking at an event in Toronto a couple of, I guess about a year ago last September.

And there's like 1500 people in the audience. I'm on stage, you've got like 15 minutes. And by the end of the thing, 1500 people are standing up and I've got the room divided, like the stadium auditorium, and these people, these people, and it's like go and all these people are like ba ba ba, and I was like, go, and they're like ba ba ba, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. And then we did a time piercing meditation. And at the end I said thank you very much. My name is Jesse Elder, uh, taxes are voluntary. Thank you, and just walked on. So it's that kind of vibe, that kind of vibe, mostly designed to open loops for people while helping them, and I hate this term, and I know this is your expertise, but like regulate themselves, regulate their nervous systems, get back into like, 00, I'm good. OK, and that's a consistent report that I hear from, from clients who do the, the deeper frequency work. They always say the same thing like I feel 50 pounds lighter. Like I feel like myself again. What the fuck was I thinking for the last 10 years? It's like, oh, all good. You're here now and you were never not there. You just had to be a retard for a while. Welcome back.

See, I think The things that you teach are so important because like this podcast or being an entrepreneur in general is a, is a pure expression of your like self being expressed without limits. And as and as you're in business, you can like you're like for me at least, I'm trying to find that flow state and sometimes we hit it, sometimes we don't, like, because once you're tapped into that. What you're creating is just like a reflection of you, right? And it's a good mirror. And so what you're doing is just getting to the core of people helping them to express whatever it is they're trying to kind of like create into the world. At least that's how I'm interpreting some of what you teach and that freedom to not have these, like, I didn't, I don't really have rules and implementation like. The school did not program me, didn't program you either. Like, I barely follow rules. We don't pay taxes.

We're about, we don't. We're about to, but we should learn from that. I actually want to talk about this, how to. Correct, the correct way to not pay taxes because avoiding them is what we're doing. That's very different. I'll just, I'll plant a seed and we'll continue. We'll come back. Yeah, there, there's, um, yeah, avoiding, avoiding anything that you're obligated to is, is living in dishonor. The question is, or the, the, the fun game is to look at what are you actually required to do versus what have you signed up for that was, that was voluntary. Yeah, yeah, or, or exit the game peacefully because it doesn't apply to you and it does feel. Not great. Like, I don't want to not, it's just, it just kind of happened and we were trying to make other things and other businesses happen and just got out of control. And yeah, it doesn't, it's like having a messy room and you're like, I really need to clean that. It's bugging me like crazy. But to your point, you're right. Like you don't really follow rules. The programming. We all have a bit of programming. You can't say we're completely unprogrammed, but the type of programming that public school and stuff tries to put in you, I definitely don't see that in, in you really at all. Yeah, but I, I mean, like I, I resonate with what you're teaching so much and it, it like.

It's a good just having this conversation. That's part of why we do these episodes because I want people to get so lost in a conversation and have this like deep reflective process happening, you know, you've listened to an episode of like Rogan or something where you're just like, I have to share this with every single human being because it's just like hits the seed in you and it changes your perception. It's like a, it's a, it's like a hero dose, right? And it just opens that and. That's what I enjoy about having these conversations, but that's what entrepreneurship or creating like money or resources or whatever it is, is, it's just that expression through you and it makes sense. Like when we've had times in businesses, like our business where things are just like, like this, it's obviously external things too, but what was going on inside of us where we could have reconnect like he's like. In order to have, if you're the dance party partner of the universe and you're leading, right? For example, this is fun, guys, the more fun you have, the more life will dance with you with fun. But then thinking of other businesses or things we've done, it's like, was I giving an energy or other things because.

Or other stresses in our lives happening whether it's relationships or you know deaths or whatever they are being reflected out of me because I'm not even processing or releasing those emotions like your father passing, giving yourself an opportunity to move through that but if you avoided that. Would you now be going a different direction because you didn't actually get colon cancer. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That that the the the part about like the the what you're creating is a mirror. It's it's so spot on and the, the, the part about fun is, is, is very, it's often misunderstood and I misunderstand it myself sometimes because when you've got like ultimate freedom, which also generally means no accountability, you're accountable only to your inspiration and the consequences of the actions that come from your inspiration. Like that could be a fine line for a lot of people and That was why when I, when I was first working on this philosophy, That it seemed to me that the boy I just looked back and I looked at the times that I was having the most fun. Sometimes you're having like you would, you don't look like you're having fun. Like I'm pinned under this dude, he's got me in a fucking headlock and I'm about to get my face punched in. Uh, you don't look like you're having fun. Like it looks like the opposite of fun.

But I remember being in that moment, first grappling tournament I ever went to, and this guy's got me and I'm just like this is fucking living right here. This is living. It's type 2 fun. It's type 2 fun. That makes more sense. And I just remember. I know what to do. Like he can't choke me out right now. He's just got me in a headlock from the back. Like he's got me like this. You can't choke somebody out that way and there's fucking dolphin to cover their blowhole maybe, but you can't get this. And I worked my way out and I got the hook and I got out. I got his back and I tapped him and I just connected again responsibility and freedom. Like take responsibility for your breathing. Are you dead yet? No, you're not dead, you're conscious. Cool. Can you be conscious for another 2 seconds while you buy yourself some time? Cool. And from there, can you advance your position? Yes, you can. Cool, do that. And I started to see the the connection between Like, like I call that fun. Like that, that is, that is being alive, man.

But that's only worth it if it has a positive impact, if it makes a difference. Otherwise it's just pure hedonism, which then you become this hollow hungry ghost and you can never get enough and you always need more and next thing you know you're the internet marketer, but That, that is hollow. But so is Trying to make a difference from a place of being disempowered and disconnected from your own joy and so the, the greatest gift that I've ever been given and that I've ever observed anybody else give is It's the gift of your own joy. Like when, when, when we show up as who and what we are, you can, you can spot your own shit super fast. Like I'll say something, I'll be like, oh man, I was, I was being such a bitch cause I was feeling insecure because that guy has a bigger car and I, uh, don't have that car. Oh, and that's why I had to make the snarky little comment about something that, oh, got it, and you just start to pop these things and next thing you know you're just living in the space of appreciation.

like appreciating everything including fucking Bill Blasio in 2020 with a cheeseburger mayor of New York, vaccination. I was like, I appreciate that fucking clown. Because how miserable do you have to be to be a fucking politician, first of all. Secondly, how miserable do you have to be to eat a fucking cheeseburger in front of the, the television to like you can't be happy, bro. Like you can't be living your best life. So you're living the false life. If you're a puppet, you have someone's hand up your ass and you're probably not enjoying it. It's a two fun guys t-shirt right there. Just put Blasio on it. Hm, vaccination. fucking retard, but I love him because you need that like, like Star Wars would suck without Darth Vader. You imagine just a bunch of goofy people dressed like Burning Man. needs a villain. You have to, you have to. So I've learned to love the villains for what they bring out of me, and I know I've been the villain. Many times, even if I'm coming from a place of positive intent, I can't, I, I can, we can all influence the impact that we have, and I think we should and this whole fucking stupid spiritual that wasn't my intent.

Like, well, what's the difference between homicide and manslaughter? In a court of law, it's intent, but in the real world, doesn't matter. Somebody died either way, so it doesn't matter what you meant. Fuck out of here, go do some more ayahuasca. But us being ourselves. Our real, our true self is inherently joyful. Our pissed off self, our angry self, our, I gotta hustle harder than anybody's self is just like, fuck you, dad, you know, or whatever. That's not who we really are. Who we really are is these peaceful little kids that just want to play together and maybe that play looks like you're gonna play the role of bully, and I'm gonna play the role of the guy that gets my ass beat, and then you're gonna go and figure it out 10 years later that, man, I was a real asshole. And then you're gonna become like nicer. Neither of those is better or worse. You have to have all of it. And so even the shit that happened like last week was it with the the the uh Charlie Kirk video, um, somebody asked me, they said, what do you think about Charlie Kirk getting killed? I said I don't.

Ask me what I think about the video, I, I'll give you opinions. But in my mind, those are two completely different things. One, I can verify, the other, I don't know. I saw a video, I saw pixels on a screen, I wasn't there. What's your opinion on the video? Uh, fake what? Uh, we'll go there in a second. We'll go there in a second or maybe on round 2. I, I will say this. Because most people, almost everybody has been so conditioned to react to authority, those that are least likely to react to authority are some of the first ones to react to groups that feel powerful and that mirror their own values back to them. That's funny. That, yeah, I haven't had words for it though. Yeah, so wait, say that again. Yeah, so when is somebody who, who's conditioned to, to respond to authority, they're very easy to control. You just like, you know, wave a flag, play a song, um, have the, the, the big kahuna wherever they are, president, premier, prime minister, whoever the authority is.

And the people that are easily controlled will just do whatever they tell them. The ones who have more agency. are hard, you can't control them with authority. So you have to use social proof. So you have to have a party, a movement, a character, a figure who's saying and doing the things that they either believe or wish they could believe. Who's saying and doing the things that that they wish they were saying and doing. And what that does is they take their, their agency and they project their agency onto that person. Now, that person becomes a proxy for their identity, which is why when the Charlie Kirk video comes out and, and you see a guy go back and you see this, this, this, you know, liquid coming out like this, um, A lot of people felt like that was personal. That makes sense. They did like, like, oh no, that happened to my guy. And it's fascinating because I I don't have any teams. Like I'm, I'm on team human in general, um, team Jesse specifically, and, uh, and I intend, I hope, I pray that in the near future that there will be a team elder family because like how could I not have kids, man? This would be fucking crime. But I've also been so avoidant for so long. I was like, oh, I'm not supposed to have kids. I'm so special. I'm just a time piercer. I'm just, nobody understands me. I'm an alien from the future. You're not good enough.

It's like, I think I'm getting over that shit. Anyway, if I have a family. And Now that's my team. I don't give a fuck about political parties. They're dying anyway, and they're, you know, they're dying because they have to keep ramping up the, the spectacle. So, when this, when this video comes out of a fairly famous guy who says a lot of things that a lot of people agree with, says a lot of things a lot of people hate, and the video comes out that looked like him getting shot, and then everybody is like, Ah, it's like you weren't on that team yesterday. But now there's so much emotion. And you can add your voice to either saying, this is what I believe in, which you wanted to say anyway, now you have a reason to say it, or you can go get mad at all the people that are saying something slightly different than you think. Slightly different than the way you see it, and you don't have to explore nuance. You can just make them the bad guy. And when you can immediately make somebody else a bad guy, by default, you are automatically the good guy and you don't have to do anything. It's like winning the game without even playing. And so, we're gonna continue to see this happen over the next, uh, it's gonna, it's gonna be really awesome over the next couple of years. Those that are tapped in, uh, more like self-authorized, um.

Basically gonna be like Teflon covered bowling balls, like nothing can stick to you. Nothing can fucking penetrate you. You cannot be fucked with. Because you know who and what you are, and there is no authority outside of God. If you don't believe that and you think that render unto Caesar what is Caesar's, well, who wrote that? Caesar, bingo, and it's like, OK, like I had a conversation with Jesus a couple weeks ago and he was like, I never said uh believe in me. I said, believe me, like look what I did, believe me they're like that's the proof what I've done you can do. He said they put the word. In me, believe in me, and they created a deity so that you feel like you're less. I was like, good ones. So, we're headed into some very exciting times for people that are that are um have the courage. And the creativity to be completely self-reliant, #1, #2, co-reliant with others that they deeply value and, and, and connect with. Um, diversity is dangerous, like diversity is so dangerous. There's studies, a buddy of mine sent me something today. There was a New York Times article, like 20 years ago, and it was the most comprehensive study on diversity ever done. And in every area where diversity was forced, people trusted each other half as much.

The volunteering went down, voting went down, all the things that are like civic communal things people stop doing when there's too much diversity versus what happens in a more homogeneous community. And I don't see that that is really much to do with race or gender ideology or gender. It has to do with shared values and and frequencies. Like they're they're given the choice between a black friend of mine who's like fucking dialed in or a white acquaintance who's an absolute piece of shit like I'm colorblind. I'm, I'm reading frequencies. It's like, yeah, culturals and your culture and your values. Like, do we match with that versus you have a completely different view and what is important to you, which is basically kind of what's happening in Europe probably on purpose. Oh big time on flooding into Ireland, UK, France, all over the place, and it's Probably some of the reason to just grab more control because of chaos, total destabilization. Um, speaking of chaos, my bladder is in chaos right now. I'm gonna piss and then can we resume because mine is too. Great, great.

OK, we're all gonna go pee together. We're all gonna hold swords. Just do a little eye gazing, then just, uh, welcome to Austin. We can kind of make a quick pivot to that we've started touching on it, but I'm curious, what is your Definition or your ideology around becoming ungovernable and becoming sovereign. Yeah, um, first I'll say the word sovereign isn't something I use very much. Um how would you define it? Um, human, human, yeah, um. And, and just a little little housekeeping on that. So sovereign, one of the, one of the definitions is a, you know, a ruler. And so when a lot of people say it, what they mean is like, like I got myself, but the word is very easily misinterpreted and they're actually legal ramifications that if someone is a sovereign citizen, that they're trying to be in competition with the government and they are now labeled domestic terrorists because of it. And there's a lot of people who are violent, they're unstable, they're completely unhealthy, um, like they need help and if they don't get it, like they need to be They need to be um I say prosecuted, but like they, they, they need to be, you know, society has, has to take care of people that are threats. And there are people who are threats who use that term sovereign citizen because they're just mentally unstable and violent. Um, my approach to that is, is very different and it's a very peaceful one.

And it's, it's more a very much an appreciation of someone who who does believe that their job is to maintain order by telling others what they can and can't do. So, I start from the place of like respect, like, You put on Kevlar to feed your family every day. Like I can't imagine how hard that must be. Like I, I, I truly respect that and If there is to be um a a a interruption in my time, or an interruption in my physical movement, or a a a presumption of some crime that I committed, or an imposition of a fine or a fee or a charge, um, I'm happy to have the dialogue. I just need to see where you can prove jurisdiction. Because, and there's a whole other thing, but the first sentence in the 14th Amendment, all persons born or naturalized.

In the United States and subject to the jurisdiction thereof. are both citizens of the state and United States citizens. So, there's 3 times in that first paragraph or first sentence where it's basically saying you're both, like you are a natural human being and you're a US citizen. US citizen is a corporate entity. It's a fictitious um Uh, entity and, and so, If somebody presumes that you are this fictitious entity and you don't know you're not, then you can't say no and your silence equals consent. And so When it comes to not not just legally or lawfully, but just freedom in general. Um, An an inanimate object, you know, this, this can of water, that plant, these phones, like if it, it belongs to you, you purchased it, um, or you made it. Then you control it and doesn't mean somebody can't swoop in and control it, but it's very obviously like that's yours. So what about our bodies?

Can anybody else force your right hand to raise? Well, they could bribe you, they could ask you, they could tell you, they could threaten you, they could manipulate you, they could influence you by having a bunch of other people raise their hand, or they could physically grab your hand and raise it. None of those changes the fact that it's your hand. Doesn't belong to anybody else. It is your hand. It is your property. What you do with this hand is completely up to you and you get to have the rewards or consequences of your use of your hand, your body, your words, and so the idea of someone else. Controlling my right hand is hilarious. It's hilarious Unless it's a Dutch rudder situation. Or there's one time in Amsterdam, but yeah, but then if um if that then extends to my time and somebody says, hey, we should meet up, like why? Why? I'm not opposed, but why? Like what, what's, why should we do that? Well, I think it'd be good to jam for who?

Well, there's a lot I could learn from you. Maybe. Like what's in it for me? Though I thought you were spiritual. Yeah, this is what advanced spirituality looks like. So, the, the automatic giving, oh yeah, here, let me give this to you because you want it or because you need it, that's communism. If there's evil on the planet besides kratom, it's communism. Fucking communism, man. Absolute evil. Oh, your need. Means that those that have automatically have to give it to you. Well, who's gonna make that happen? Oh, the party, cool, we'll we'll do that. Your lack of preparation does not constitute my, my emergency. Exactly, exactly. So extend out this, this concept of, of, and I don't, I, I wouldn't even say ownership because I, I mean this is God's hand as far as I'm concerned, and that energy which I understand is God is.

Ultimate sentience, but also has no skin in the game. Doesn't have emotions, isn't passive aggressive, isn't happy when you do this from this book and sad when you do that from that book. Who wrote that book? Oh, men, cool. Not saying that it wasn't inspired, but I'd rather just go to the source, like, I don't need the user manual. So, This isn't my hand, but I am, I am a steward of this hand. So the, the money that might come to someone, um, if you have a corporation and that money goes into the corporation, governments created corporations, therefore, corporation has to abide by the rules of the creator. Government created corporation, but government did not create human beings. So, if somebody receives um payment, And that could be a lot of different words. It might be income, it might be a donation, it might be a gift, it might be an exchange, it might be a barter. But when when a man or woman receives Money That's their money.

So, how does it make sense that someone else say, excuse me. You have to give me or us some of that money. I'm, I'm happy to if I'm, if I'm like if that's, if that's the law, I'm happy to. Please show me where it says I am a taxpayer. You're a US citizen. Show me where it says that. Cause I got, I've got paperwork on file with return receipts, um, basically saying thank you very much for your letter, uh, thank you for unsubscribing, have a wonderful life. Call us if you ever get lonely. Everything is voluntary. Everything is voluntary. So, if this body is mine to steward, So is my time. So are my words, so is my energy, so is my attention, so is my money. These are all mine to steward so that I can fulfill my spiritual purpose on this planet. And there is, it's an impossibility, a physical impossibility, emotional impossibility, a social impossibility. It's a metaphysical impossibility for anyone else to get between me and the creator.

Can't happen. Unless through my consent. That's why the myth of the vampires, you have to let them in. Once they let them in, they can kill you. Or turn you into an undead. But you have to invite them in? So in the eyes of the law, and I'll play devil's advocate. You, let's say you've removed yourself as a US citizen to become a human. Well, to not to become a human, to to keep your rights as a human without subscribing to the governmental overlords of citizenship. I'm, I'm happy and, and I hope there's some watching this video. Like I'm happy to do anything that I am lawfully and legally obligated to do. Um, you, you don't, you can't become a natural being. You, you arrive that way. Through deception or trickery or social proof, you can Not learn That this is a fiction And therefore, it's, it's real. But The, the, the whole key in my experience, the whole key to this is, is truly being peaceful. And if I've ever, I've gotten some really like cool calls.

And this is agent so and so and we're going to do this. Amazing. I understand you're trying to contact Jessie Elder. I may be able to help you with that matter. But I never authorized that name to be used for commerce in the corporate state of Texas. So there are 7 questions that you have to answer first before I can proceed. Um, let me know when you'd like to get those questions. Call me back at this number or this email. Um, have an awesome day. I look forward to hearing from you. So then is this, so someone wanted to get to a point where you're at. Is it A series. Obviously you need to know the law. That's step one, like you need to really study it and get it. Is it also filing a series of paperworks and like becoming something or is the best part is it both? This is the best part. It's, it's or we already have this, we just don't know how to use it. That's also it. Um, this is the best, this is so, so good. Just like, um, just like fighting. While fighting is, is Combat and confrontation. This doesn't always have to be, but there's very, there's so many similarities. There are no, there's no right way to defend yourself in a, in a street fight. There's no right way, like this is the path to protect yourself or someone you love if somebody's trying to attack you, but there are ways that work and there are ways that don't work. And so, This is what is so fascinating about the law and the the difference between the public realm and the private realm is there isn't a way to do it.

There are thousands of ways, thousands, and they're so customizable according to your values and your vision, to your spiritual principles, to the work that you do in the world, and most of what I had been called to do is just to educate people so that they know what questions to ask and then they can connect with, um, you know, there are people that I'm Very, very close with who I trust implicitly, who have billionaire grade legal architecture that's been looked at by lawyers and IRS agents and everything else and they're like, yeah, this is airtight, invisible and bulletproof. Shout out one stupid fuck. Uh, no, Brandon's cool. Brandon's cool. Brandon is a very good source of education. Um, but he does something different. He does something different. Yeah, the people that, the people that I, um, and connected with are not very public. And so every time I introduce them to somebody, it's someone who's already gone through, um, the main thing is that somebody has to be in alignment and that this has to be.

True like it's truth. It's not a loophole. They're not trying to get out of something. They, they have to really be like, holy shit. You have to believe I knew it. Like I fucking knew it. I always knew it and my fucking gym teacher that tried to own me and tell me I had to do these things, ah, that's the same thing that I've been doing. It's healing, man. So it's some of the most powerful spiritual development on the planet. I bet. Yeah. So aside from the spiritual development, which is for a massive piece of it, what are the benefits at like. To a human living in this on this landmass if they go through this process. Uh, well, again, the benefits are, are very unique to them. Um, things that I've heard are, um, it's, it's pretty awesome to know who and what you are and that if someone would like to do business with you, that you can invite them, you can write a letter of conditional acceptance to accept your invitation under these terms. And it's It, it's like being the only guy in the room who knows jiu-jitsu and everybody else is like a tai chi master.

There's just literally zero way that anybody can ever be a threat to you. Now, when people have a low frequency, they immediately go to, what about Waco? What about Ruby Ridge, da da da da da. Well, I don't know those people who were involved. Um, I do believe it happened, and that is an inevitable manifestation of a preceding frequency. And so like somebody was asking me, I've had this many times, they're like, what if you go to jail? And that What if a fucking meteor lands on my head? Like what if I get struck by lightning 3 times today? What if, like what's the point of asking these what if questions? That's your fear. I'm not afraid to go to jail. I'm not afraid to fucking die. I can't die. So even if my body were to be forcibly kidnapped and put inside a cell, it would most likely be for a white collar crime, which I didn't even commit, but I fucked up on the paperwork or I didn't say the right thing. Oh, now I have a 5 year federal vacation, which is hilarious considering that I didn't even pay for it.

And now I'm getting room and board and some of allegedly the most amazing networking on the planet. And now all I have to do is just think every day. Do you realize how awesome that is for me? Uh, actually, how do I sign up for this, you know. So yeah, there's zero fear. Those who are incarcerated are incarcerated inside first before the bars ever appear around them. I'm free on the inside. And there's no, there's liter, it's a physical metaphysical impossibility for something to form around us that didn't already form within us. So, there's as many benefits as as somebody wants to have. Tactically speaking, which is I think is a part of your question, um, yeah, it depends. I mean, if somebody is a taxpayer where they have a taxpaying entity that is lawfully and legally bound to send 12%, 24%, 46% as as they're per the contract, and all of a sudden they change their entities lawfully and legally to become private. And so it is no longer a legal taxpayer. If they tried to pay taxes, they'd actually go to jail.

For perjury So then they're the the recapture of those assets can be deployed in any way they want. I do believe that it is best, actually it's the only option that those assets are redeployed in ways that are in the highest good in alignment with their spiritual values. So, like I would never work with somebody who they're like, I paid, you know, 3.2 million last year in taxes and I'd rather buy a yacht. I'm like, yeah, I'm not, not your guy. Nothing against the yachts. I would think they're cool, but I'd, I'd rather hear, um, like is that, is that the highest, I'm not judging, but is that the highest thing that your soul is calling you to do as a steward of this, this money? And you ask people a few more questions and they're like, Oh shit, this is real. And then next thing you know, they're forming a land collective or they're, you know, forming a land trust or a PMA or something and then now we're talking closer to the land, closer to God, closer to each other. That's somebody I'll I'll talk to.

What you've done, you have your own property in Bastrop, yeah. Last I checked, yeah, yeah, I haven't been out there in a while. Some private entity does. What's that? said some private entity private entity. You don't, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, uh, no, that's, it's a beautiful piece of land. But there are people who are man there there there are like Curtis Stone. Curtis Stone is an absolute legend and Curtis, if anybody wants to learn homesteading, check out Curtis. Like he's he's legit. And he's super savvy in law too. So he's It's good. What inspired you to get that piece of property? Uh, COVID, like I was on a road trip in, uh, that summer and I just started to really feel like get land, and it was very driven by, like I, man, I became such a prepper in like April, May, June, since then, um, end of 2020, and land just felt like the right thing to do. So, found a piece of land, bought it. And the intent, this is a this is a big blind spot for me, but the end and it goes back to the whole of freedom and avoidance thing. The intent.

Get this, get this land, build this permaculture fucking paradise. Let's do structures and, and, and, uh, theater and podcast studio and shooting range and dojo and, you know, podcast or a pod learning for kids and and a racetrack for thoroughbred Arabian horses and you know, it's just like this is what it's gonna be and uh it has very much not been any of that. We've had a great team, but without my complete dedicated, passionate direction, They're, they've done an amazing job. Um, and we've had a couple of guys who, who have, have been instrumental. Um, Orion Black was a guy that I met, uh, through a client and Orion came in, we worked together for like 2 years and he flew every month, flew down here, and I retained his services, and he just drafted this vision, this plan, directed the, the work and made a big difference in. The beginning of it. And then, uh, Darren, who's living out there now, is keeping an eye on things, but I've also told him, I said, man, while I'm in all this other transition, like this is a, this is a personally funded project. It's the most expensive money thing that I've ever done because every month is just like putting into it, putting into it is not a business. So I'm not a model for it in in that respect in in any way, shape or form.

What is the output of it? Um. Oxygen. Those trees just spit off oxygen like nobody's business. That's about it. Do you? Oh, good, you may be a customer. Yeah, there's really no output right now. Like it's, it's just a beautiful piece of land. It's all raw and you've seen it. Yeah. So, that that will change in one way or the other, you know, I mean, if, if it's, if I am supposed to continue to steward it, then that will take off. If I'm not, then it will go to somebody that will. And I'm peaceful either way. Hm. When are we gonna talk about anything deep, meaningful? This has just been really just pretty surface level. I think we only have like kind of, kind of lame. Yeah, you know, we should probably just not even release this one. Yeah, I think it really just, just try it again. Uh, and there's a bunch of other things I want to talk about, but we only have like 7 minutes, so we don't want to open those cans of worms. We can, we can open them, and then we'll have episode 2, and just close them real quick. This is copywriting 101. Keep a couple of loops. That's right. That's right. I have a course on open loops coming out. I'll tell you about it.

I'm, I'm curious to get into the conversation of like AI, right? One thing that's extremely popular right now is all the different AI podcasts, AI videos, you know, that paper they did that, what is it, the AI something 2027, that super long research paper that came out, those two guys, uh, about like the two possible outcomes. I watched like a, what was considered a short. summary that was 45 minutes about it, which is extremely interesting and I'm curious, your Perspective of where things will go. In the next 5. Years as well as 10, cause I'm for me I seeing stuff change so rapidly. And I don't think a lot of people are aware of how rapidly it's going to change. I also think it's going to be a period of time of great Creativity, entrepreneurship, more time to dive into spirituality and health and well-being, living to 150, but You could easily go the opposite direction and maybe demise quicker if you subscribe to the like the negative possible outcome. So that's why I kind of asked about the land because I think personally that For myself is an important thing to have in your portfolio as things progress, um, because the things, if, if over time AI, let's say, does take a lot of roles that humans, or there is a lot more chaos because they say all the white collar workers that are sitting behind office chairs, you know, 50% are wiped out and all that.

You need a place that like what are what are the fundamental things that are important to be able to be in nature, which is so important to your health and creativity, and then the people you love to be in that space as well and potentially extract yourself from if you're deep in a city and chaos is unfolding to be able to pull yourself away from that as well as you won't be able to rely on, you don't know what's going to happen with food. So it's almost I see this like advancement as well as going back to the roots of what it means to be a human being, like hunter gatherer, like philosophy, like the Greeks, like the Greeks cared mostly about was like literature, physical health, and I think it was like music or something. These very fundamental important things. They weren't worried about all this other stuff. And so that's probably a very long conversation. Well, we asked for open loops. That was, that was a lot of loops. I'll, I'll say two things. Number one, I have no fucking clue what's gonna happen. Um, and I think anybody who says they do is either selling something or is completely blind to any sort of historical accuracy. Um, if you would have been able to translate a conversation with a Comanche tribe.

50 years before the first Mexicans showed up. And told them, here's what your next 150 years are going to look like. That would have been like the worst news ever and then you would have been killed just like over 8 days just for being there. Let alone saying, hey, your entire way of life is about to end. But if you would have said that to a Comanche war chief or the tribe, um, when Jack Hayes and the Texas Rangers were literally riding across this land that we're in chasing Comanches. They'll be like, OK, I get it. And then when Quana Parker were the last of the Comanche chiefs. was started dressing in suits and started living in houses and became an entrepreneur. That was one of the most sad things that ever happened and there were no saints. They were the most murderous, bloodthirsty fucking tribe. No heroes, no, no villains, you know, it's all everybody's doing their thing. Um, I believe there's a there's a chance that AI will do to humans what the US government did to indigenous people.

There's a very strong chance of that. Um, I think that our Collectively, the gap between what we can imagine and what we're capable of is bigger than it's ever been. Specifically, when people talk about returning to land or they talk about defending themselves, and it's like, dude, you literally are the weakest person in a five-mile radius. Like you don't know how to choke somebody out, you don't know how to fight, um, you're harmless, you're harmless. So I don't really want to have a conversation with somebody who wants to talk about like we should talk about community defense. I'm like why don't you talk about defending yourself against cheeseburgers. Because you're not doing well. They're winning. They're winning that battle, vaccination. So, there it's, it's a lot of hyperbole and a lot of like planning that never turns in anything, which is why like with my consulting and coaching, I will only start strategizing and and sharing prophecy and then war gaming and running simulations, and we also do peace gaming.

After I get a sense of what like what somebody's assets are, what their resources are, what's their history, like do a full diagnostic. Otherwise, it runs the risk of just becoming one more voice of like, oh, I heard this guy say that he thinks this is gonna happen and then that becomes a meaningful conversation. So, um, it's a one, I mean, it's an ultimate question we can dive in another time, um. There isn't, there is going to be, I believe there's gonna be a bifurcation and we're already in it and it's the fake is gonna get even more fake. Artificial is gonna become so artificial, which also means it's going to be increasingly appealing, undeniably appealing, irresistibly appealing to the human brain, nervous system, like you literally are fucked. You are fucked. Like I think about my nephews who are teenagers and have Instagram. I'm like, I found a stash of like 30 porn magazines when I was 12 and it destroyed my adolescence, destroyed my adolescence. Well, I destroyed my adolescence because I also was super shy and I had all this like big love and big heart but didn't know how to talk to girls. And then meanwhile, here's this stash of porn and I think about my nephews, you know, 1213, 1516, and they've all got phones and I'm just like, God damn it.

Take that times a billion humans are fucked, man. Absolutely fucked. Yeah, when you're gonna have an AI headset, a VR headset, you can take, you know, the girl in your class you have a crush on, put her face on a porn star's body, and then you're just gonna lock yourself in your room if you're a 15-year-old kid, and you're gonna have like the flashlight 3500. Yeah, it's just gonna be fucking twisty. It's gonna be changing car. There's gonna be Amazon drones gonna change the cartridge. Out for you, your comm cartridge gets automatically replaced. Yeah, and you're like, can you put the goat pussy option in there? They're like, bad. It's like it's gonna be insane, but that's only gonna appeal to people partly for a short time and then they're gonna have like a breakdown and either need real or they'll need more fake. And so there's gonna be those splits are going to keep happening. Um, and I don't think the answer is it needs to be as extreme as a lot of people think it does. I think people look for extreme cause they're bored with their own lives. So the idea of having an extreme solution is more excited than the fact that like their house is a mess like you were talking about. It's like, how about clean up your house? Maybe.

How about uh text back that friend that you didn't text. How about, um, write a fucking letter to that gym teacher that made you feel like shit and just say you were a fucking piece of shit that was so uncalled for and I recognize you're doing the best you could with what you had and here's what I learned from it. Hope you're well, and then take the letter, set it on fire, like do that, you'll feel better. And then the fear on the outside diminishes cause you're no longer distorted inside, then the whole world starts to look like Eden again. So there's tactics, but that's the starting point. Well, they'll have to tune in to episode 2. To get the rest of it. Dude, Jesse, thank you for coming on, man. This was, this was an OK conversation. average, not bad for a Saturday. Yeah, I could have done something else with my two hours, but I mean, it was awesome. Super great to have you on, and yeah, we, we appreciate you coming and appreciate your time, dude, and for sharing your vulnerabilities, your stories, your, your wisdom. This was awesome, brother.

Thank you. Yeah, one, one more time, you're Podcast restarting up. Just let everybody know one more time. Yeah, where do they find you? It'll be on the pod, the current podcast is on Spotify. Jesse Elder, um, right now I'm currently Law dojo on Instagram. Um, I was time piercer for a long time, but I just got this super hit. It's like, no, you need to do law for a while. So law dojo, um, Jesse Elder everywhere else. So, yeah, man, appreciate it. Good stuff. Thank you guys.